For Example, Friday

I’d been wanting to write a poem all week, and finally got inspired by David Kirby’s poem “The Rhetorical Device Known as What-Aboutery.”

…it takes a while to get from where

you are to where you want to be, especially 

if you don’t know where you’re going in the first place,

which you shouldn’t, as the scientists

 say, if you know what you’re doing, it isn’t research.

Discovery

What if I was to truly open my mind 

to what could be discovered each day 

without judgment on my part?

For example, Friday.

A routine eye appointment for Jim turned long

Hemorrhaging in the eye

Causing an afternoon at another doctor

Trying to get it under control

And I stayed focused on what mattered.

I discovered I could 

read my book 

relax into just being

I had been contemplating what fun is in my life.

So I decided picking up a book 

I’ve meant to read for years would be fun 

and making dinner — a joy.

I’m discovering a moment holds a lot of mini-happiness.

In a book I just finished there was a great line:

Happiness is circulatory.

Someone else said fun leads to happiness, not the other way around.

Fun being playfulness + communication + flow.

So there is the recipe.

Will I ever say the day Jim’s eye 

hemorrhaged was a FUN day?

No, probably not.

Will I say I flowed through it 

and discovered a calm around it?

Yes, that I can say.

It’s my own research into the 

art of being.

School of Love (7 Lines/7 Days #79)

 #108Weeks

November 14-20, 2021

 

 

A three hour lunch with a friend brought energy and renewed determination.

 

The world is nothing but a school of love.

 

My angel spirit has been direct--listen for guidance. Following those instructions diligently.

 

Remembering to roll with the waves of the ocean.

 

Begged my AP again for help with 9th period, and I finally got it. 

The paraprofessional arrived and received the full-blown experience since all students were present, 

complete with a spilled bottle of glitter. 

(I hate pep rally days.)

 

5th period surprised me when they chose Bill Withers' song "Just the Two of Us" as their team song.

 

Strong Back

Soft Front

Wild Heart

(Thank you Brene Brown)

Thank You, Toms (7 Lines/7 Days #70)

 #108Weeks

September 12-18, 2021

 

After all the #NeverForget stuff last week, all I have to say is that every time we get a chance to love better, we blow it.

Getting pickier about how I spend my time has enabled me to feel like my free time goes slower.

I am held in the heart of God. All things work toward good.

Creative Writing Club got off to a good start.

The reading kids are setting in, and patience has been my friend.

Had an epiphany at my music lesson Thursday -- how learning the mandolin and teaching reading connect. All because of Tom Petty's "Wildflowers" and my excellent teacher, who also happens to be named Tom.

I feel I've found a missing piece. Thank you, Toms! 

 

Tom Marcellis

The Unfolding World (7 Lines/7 Days #65)

 #108Weeks

August 8-14, 2021

"The safe place is an untroubled heart and mind."

Keep practicing presence. It's working.

The thing I want to remember most is to be with people. Notice them. Listen.

"My dreams are important to the unfolding of the world."

An 8th grade student in my Global Perspectives class arrived with fond memories of our class novel The Bridge Home from 6th grade. Did my heart good.

We still don't have access to our required reading curriculum, so the team keeps having to scramble to find things to do.

I'm surprisingly well-rested. Don't feel tired at all. It was a good week.

Back in Balance (7 Lines/ 7 Days #63)

 #108Weeks

 July 25-31, 2021

 

 The trip put me in Zen mode.

This is my final week of the summer and the focus is self-care.

It's nice to be lazy!

I'm feeling a desire to get back to writing, but just can't grab on to anything. Who am I as a writer?

In a poem I read, the word "balance" stood out to me. I contemplated all the ways this applies right now.

It's really about watching my mind and responding to where it leads me.

Living the question brought me an answer. I have a new, solid, meaningful writing project on the horizon, and its making me feel connected and whole again.

Standing on Solid Ground (7 Lines/7 Days #47)

 #108Weeks

 

April 4-10, 2021

 

 

I had a dream I was driving down an extremely steep road and was terrified, but made it safely to the bottom and solid ground. Upon waking, I could see it was a metaphor for this school year.

The last 2 mornings in nature were magically perfect. So many birds! There are angels all around us.

I kept reminding myself to say in the moment and it came in handy when Jim's eye blew up again and we was in horrible pain.

I just have to take things as they come.

The Universe gifts me with courage.

It was announced Home Connect will be gone next year. I celebrated by making a list of all the teaching techniques I can use when I don't have to worry about including kids on Zoom. HOO-RAY!!!

68 more days until the last day of school.

Today Felt Wonderfully Normal

 Today I met my dear friends Laurie and Annmarie at Six Mile Cypress Slough for some nature listening and writing.  I was inspired by Richard Blanco before making the trip, and used the end of his poem "American Wandersong" for my format.

For now: Gorgeous day -- low to mid 70s right now and breezy. Dew point in the 60s.

For now: Deep gratitude that I am in this place to take this time. Felt impossible over the past many weeks.

For now: The breeze ruffles my hair and I hear my friends' gentle laughter.

For now: Thinking about the Days of Mindfulness I spent here, and thinking how Julia Cameron calls it "heartfulness."  Distant hawk calls. The breeze wraps around me. I can hear the traffic on the other side of the lake and rookery.

For now: I've come to understand the water is higher than it should be and this is upsetting the ecology. Must be why I'm not hearing the nightly frog chorus. Off to the southwest I hear a whistling bird -- Laurie says it sounds like a creaking playground swing.

For now: An alligator draped across the log, limp, tail curled to catch the sunlight; hawk calling out across the Slough.

For now: A Limpkin picks his way through the water, lifting his legs high and pacing in between the trees.

For now: White feather floats in the clear water, bright green salvinia touching its edges.

For now: I came. I listened. I wrote.

Making My Way (7 Lines/ 7 Days #39)

 #108Weeks

 

February 7-13, 2021

Reviewing data and asking my students what they need has put me on a solid trajectory.

I sat on the lanai with a glass of wine and sketched out a sequence for my units.

"You need to start where people are."

AC is a problem again, draining me by the end of the day -- kids are complaining.

I must video my lessons religiously. Speaking all day in a mask in a warm room is torture.

Everyday...water flowing around the rocks...making my way.

Hoping to have a lot of rest and relaxation this weekend.

Entering the Quiet Zone

We are more than a week into the holiday break, and I've entered the Quiet Zone.

Today I followed through on a decision I had made which was to use the "What's Your Word" cards my writing friend Kathy gave me as part of a gift exchange. There are 33 cards that ask questions that are supposed to lead you to your "word."  I decided to go through the questions quickly and answer with one sentence each. After a warm-up and a jump start, there are several categories, each with a few related questions. Categories like Let Go, Be Me, Dream, Grow, Love, and Serve.

Answering these questions in a real "in the moment" fashion helped me get quickly to a couple important things happening with me: one has to do with physical strength, and the other has to do with how I want to spend my time going forward.

For many years I had a lot of different things going. A few years ago I cut back. I decided I wanted to spend most of my time focused on writing.  And I did pretty well with that. I've completed several personal challenges, continue to write a poem a day, and my daily journaling, of course.

But something has shifted, and now there are other things that are calling for my time. One is the mandolin. I'm enjoying getting back into it focused just on ways to have fun and play with others. Second is my Music Polls page. I thoroughly enjoy what I'm doing with it, and others seem to like it, too. And third, a bit of art. I've committed to practicing some Zentangle, and that has been relaxing fun. No goals. Just do it.

One thing that has been a concern though, is what I feel is a physical weakening. It really started with the knotted up lat muscles in my side that sometimes made it painful to stand for any period of time, let alone do any walking. I've noticed a difference in my physical strength since I turned 65, and the lat situation has compounded it, keeping me from being as active as I need to be. I still do my daily yoga and stretching, but things like walks and weights and cycling have taken a back seat. Well, are fairly non-existent.

Answering the questions in the "What's Your Word" put this in the forefront. I realized as hard as it is, I have to find ways to start building strength.

So there is my word.  STRENGTH

I started here...a return to Six Mile Cypress Slough, where I walked nearly two miles with nary a twinge from my crazy lats, and thorough enjoyment of the slough itself. Throughout the pandemic I knew the slough boardwalk was open, but I didn't go because of a simple thing like the bathrooms not being available. By the time I drive there, I usually need to use the restroom before wending my way along the boardwalk, which takes the visitor through pinewoods, a hardwood forest, a hammock, and more than a few ponds. But yesterday I learned the park was fully open, and I knew that was my first stop today.

My friend Kara shared with me her focus for the coming year: Peace, Energy, Calm. Add to that STRENGTH. And that is what I felt today, finally returning to the slough, where I don't think I've been in quite a long time. At least a year...maybe longer. 

Entering the Quiet Zone is a natural part of this bridge of time between Christmas and New Years, a time I traditionally use to reflect and ground myself. All the right ingredients came together today. I intend to use them all to keep my STRENGTH building, despite any setbacks or frustrations. It is the most perfect and necessary thing for me right now. 

STRENGTH -- Challenge Accepted!!!!

Labyrinth of Love (7 Lines/ 7 Days #32)

 #108Weeks

 

December 20-26, 2020

 

Photo by Kara Vereen

 

Take a line from someone else's poem and carry it forward

"It is necessary to come back and work in the world"

Wonderful dinner at Origami. Christmas Star bright. 

The dawning of the Age of Aquarius

Art & lunch & labyrinth & ice cream 

on a perfect weather day

Yesterday was stellar. My writing partners are writing again!

This is the time to be loyal to myself and do the things that nourish me,

including exercise and sitting Zazen

What a lovely Christmas!

Jim and I * Christmas 2020 * Bunche Beach

 

Quote from Instructions to the Cook: A Zen Master's Lessons on Living a Life that Matters

 by Bernie Glassman and Rick Fields

Remember Yourself

 Caboose poem inspired by "Blackbirds" by Julie Cadwallader Staub

We live and move and have our being here,

in this curving and soaring world.

We do not always recognize our influence

or remember what we came here to teach.

It's happening always.

It's our state of being.

It's who we are

at the core

     the heart

     the things pushing us within,

     whether we feel it or not.

Take your eyes to the sky and learn.

Remember yourself.

It's big.

     It's bold.

          It's ever-changing.

Chill Week (7 Lines/ 7 Days #28)

 #108Weeks

 

November 22 - 28, 2020

 

 

Yesterday I spontaneously set up a Music Polls page.  Lots of fun so far.

 

I am feeling a lot of creativity in my personal writing and stuff for school, 

and I think I need to allow it.  Just dig in!

Even though I'm not doing...doing...doing, I'm sure enjoying this week.

Had a fun day yesterday: art exhibit, lunch on a veranda, & gelato all with a good friend.

 

Biden gave a beautiful Thanksgiving address. He is the right man for the moment. 

Every time I see him I love him more and more. 

I've kicked into a good place.  I will be ready for the next 3 weeks.

Today I return to mandolin playing after over two years!

Enduring Advice on a Birthday Week (7 Lines/7 Days #12)

 #108Weeks

 August 2-8, 2020

 

"If you're going to pray, don't worry. If you're going to worry, don't pray."

 Not sure exactly why, but fear has flown away. I'm sure whatever happens is all in Divine Order.

I am feeling positive this will take us to the place we need to be.

"Do everything as if it's your last time doing it."

I will know what to do when it is time to do it.

Going back through my journals and papers has helped me see part of me -- some I don't like too much -- but it definitely was a worthwhile project. I feel better about everything because of it.

"Just keep swimming."

Jason & Jack (7 Lines/7 Days #8)

#108Weeks


(Note: This week my thoughts seemed to be all over the place. I tried to group things as well as possible, and then framed with my favorite quotes from the week.)




Jason Reynolds says a synonym for freedom is "breathlaughter."

      Getting in the flow of my journal project.
      I'm really in "finishing stuff" mode.

                            Alliance for the Arts has opened an exhibit. Can't wait to go!

      I had too much faith in "good sense will prevail."
      What will happen when there aren't enough teachers?

                            Jack Kerouc says: "There's your karma, ripe as peaches."

Wa-Ke Hatchee Lullaby

I like reflecting on how things fall into place, how synchronicity plays a role in our actions, and how connections are made.

This is one of those stories. My poem will follow.

Yesterday I woke up and became aware of a "blackout" day. It was a relief to me, since I felt a deep need to retreat. I wrote a poem about it. I avoided social media. And I took care of myself.

As part of my retreat, I decided to take a walk at a local park and look for signs and symbols and messages that might help me through this highly unusual time. The park I chose is down the street from me, the name having historical significance:

Wa-Ke Hatchee Park takes its name from a combination of Native American names combining "cow" and "water." A creek that cuts through the property was an important watering hole for Florida cowboys as the last source of fresh water for their cattle as they headed to Punta Rassa for shipment to Cuba. 

I found what I was looking for at the park (explained in the poem), and used my Animal Medicine (Native American) book to discern what the message was. The overarching theme: Don't give in to illusions.

Always good advice. 

Then today my dear friend and writing partner Laurie put up a prompt to use a golden line from a song as a starter for a poem of our own. I had just listened to David Bowie's Hunky Dory, and knew I'd go back to his song lyrics. I still recall how taken I was with Bowie's lyrics on this album when I discovered him as a senior in high school. One great songwriter.

Finally, a word on the title. There is singer/songwriter I have had the pleasure of hearing perform, and the good fortune of participating in his songwriting workshops at the Sanibel Island Writer's Conference.  His name is Dan Bern, and one of my favorite songs by him is called "Albuquerque Lullaby." Immediately after writing this poem, which uses Bowie lyrics to open and close, I knew I wanted to call it "Wa-Ke Hatchee Lullaby."  But I didn't know why. It was a poem about NOT going to sleep.

So I looked up the meaning of lullaby, discovering it can be a song used to pass down cultural knowledge, to expand communication skills, and to regulate behaviors. I had no idea! Sometimes our heart knows things that we haven't consciously processed yet.

The opening of this poem is from Bowie's song "Oh, You Pretty Things." The ending is from "Fill Your Heart."

Wa-Ke Hatchee Lullaby

"Look out my window, what do I see

A crack in the sky and a hand reaching down to me"

to give me a shake from my complacency

The world slowed down this spring

and learned to breathe

And those who let it transform them

didn't need any weapons or superior power

Discovering that this is a time to look beyond

what we normally see -- to stop, look, and listen

to the pain of hundreds of years

designed by those who relish weapons and superior power

Who believe in only one way to get it

Yet it appears we've reached the hour.

I walked where the Wa-Ke Hatchee once quenched the thirst 

of those on the road

hoping to quench a thirst of my own

I saw Turtle, Dragonfly, Crow

with their wise messages for me

Ask for assistance and abundance will flow

Break down the illusions that restrict actions and ideas

Let personal integrity be your guide

Marinating in these words for a night and day

illusions began to drop away

a way forward is what I now see

"Gentleness clears the soul

Love cleans the mind and makes it free."

Final note: I went to find a video for "Fill Your Heart" and learned it is not a Bowie composition, but was written by Biff Rose and Paul Williams. Bowie did compose "Oh You Pretty Things."

Enjoy!

Every Little Cell...

Back when I was a sponsor for Youth of Unity, we used to sing this silly little song called 

"Every Little Cell in My Body is Happy."  

Boy, did I feel that today.

The beaches have reopened.  I went to Bunche the first hour after dawn.

I was not prepared for this.

 

The energy!

The deep breathing!

The incredible high!

In fact, on the way home I heard Muddy Waters singing "Champagne and Reefer" 

and I thought, yeah...like that! 

Only better.

Walking in a Different Direction

It is the first full day of spring break.

Ordinarily, I would be totally exhausted, crashed out, not willing to move.

But this year is different. I am full of energy. I'm committed to keeping my body moving, to get out in the sun and beautiful air, enjoy the last of this winter and the early days of Florida spring.

This past quarter was one of the easiest I've ever had. The curriculum I'm teaching, as well as the four creative writing classes, are keeping me from getting dragged down.

Then today, by happenstance, I took a slightly different pathway through my neighborhood. I didn't realize that I usually walk in the same direction in this particular section of our development. It struck me the minute I saw the yellow house with the purple door.  Hmmm...I've never seen that before.

Then it was the frog menagerie:

The tall monkey pine, towering over every other tree and house.  Noticed there were actually two of them in this area.

And my favorite, a lone yellow flowering tree. This is a tree I love here in Florida that only blooms in March. Unfortunately, most of them got destroyed in Irma.

What have I learned?  It pays off to do things differently.  My classes at school. My wardrobe. My walking patterns.

Mix it up. Find joy. Pay attention!

32. Everything I Need to Know

#64Challenge

It has been the most easy-going quarter of my entire teaching career.

I feel like I've finally landed in a zone. I am teaching FOUR creative writing classes -- what a DREAM!

I am teaching one advanced reading, but I had figured out the best way to approach the current unit last year, so PIECE OF CAKE.

I am following a clearly defined program with intensive readers. I couldn't be happier. So much less work for me. Always thought I'd hate this kind of thing, but this one is particularly good. And Lord knows -- NOT easy for the kids. I'm still using my skills as a teacher to get them where they need to be.

My room is decorated with my creative writing students' work. We riffed off of Robert Fulghum's "All I Ever Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten."  With our new focus on publication and presentation, they were to create a hard copy version with some kind of image/decoration. The creative end of this was a lot of fun for those who dove in to make it a worthwhile activity -- which was most of them. I must say, I'm pleased with the way things are going, and I am working on taking them deeper and getting into more complex ideas and forms.

It's February, and everything I need to know is right in front of me: Be creative. Have fun. Be flexible. Don't stress.

19. Things I Am Noticing

#64Challenge

This is not pre-planned. I've made no list. I just found myself here and felt it was time to just write about the things I noticed this week.

1. I gave my readers a survey and noticed that in general, things are in positive motion.

2. I hung up my Dream Flag for the first time in my CLMS classroom, and it is a beautiful companion.

3. I gave up hope that my disruptive learners would act differently. It enabled me to take more relaxed action when they did.

4. I was able to think creatively about how to handle specific situations with my advanced readers.

5. I'm developing different and more expansive ways to realize literacy.

6. The calendar seems to be my enemy at times because I have so many ideas. This has caused me to layer ideas together in integrated ways, yet still get the job done.

7. I found myself tuning in to learners who have been on the fringes. That felt good.

8. I introduced Doodle Notes to my readers with great success.

9. I feel bad I haven't gotten to found poetry yet.

10. I'm enjoying seeing the little successes every day.

The Ocean Inside

Last night I read through all the "crash and burns" I wrote at the beginning of our creative writing classes this past school year. C & B is a stream-of-consciousness technique used to burn off things that are on the mind in order to open up to creativity. I always write with the class.

I was a bit taken aback by the many irritations I revealed in the writing. When I think of the school year, I seriously don't remember that stuff.  But then I realized it was because I "crash and burned" it -- I dumped it on the page so I wasn't carrying it.  Cool revelation. It was working!

Anyway, in October I came across a poem I wrote during the crash and burn. I immediately recognized the subject as being something in the book poemcrazy by Susan Goldsmith Wooldridge.  I had read a chapter called "the poemfish out loud as a way to get started in the crash and burn. (Some kids appreciate having the prompt to get them going.)

Here is what I wrote:

The poemfish swims
on rough days when no one
can remember who or what
they are. The poemfish won't
stop knocking at the door, coming
back for Chromebooks. The poemfish
thinks I wrote a referral when it
was just a lunch detention. The
poemfish knows it is not worth it
to let a student fail -- and the
poemfish really doesn't care. The
poemfish will write an ode to
something long ago & missed.
The poemfish will refill her
water bottle and order more
Rescue Remedy and go to yoga
because there is no better way to
adjust from a day of busy aggravations. 
The poemfish figures missing items
are not coming back and, oh well.
I want to settle into my house &
play mandolin and maybe finally
organize my music I said I would
do last winter. The poemfish knows
it's getting harder & harder to schedule
time with the writing group, our lives
so much busier and crazier. Yet
the poemfish has discovered that
her life can have balance. Yes --
balance after all.

3:20 pm    10/3/18

I was a bit delighted finding this, so I went back to the chapter in Susan's book and found this in the chapter:

The poems really are messages to me whispering, Be calm, go deep, go slow. There's a long poem brewing in me, "The Poemfish," still rough,

...When the poemfish moves
the sea lights up
with stars that dip and swim...
The poemfish lives
in the night ocean.
If you sleep mouth open
the poemfish might swim in.
You'll dream salty words
that swim away sideways, slow...

And now I remember. Worrying about what people think of me and my poems always gets me in trouble. I get lost "out there."  It's the process of writing poems that helps me bring my heart back home. It put me in touch with the ocean inside I can never lose, where poems come from and where I connect to me. (50)

When I go back and look at my "poemfish" poem, I see that it is full of past and present, of calming myself down, of coming to terms, of revelation, and yes, even a weird shift in point of view. In some cases the poemfish was other people who were coming and going. On first read, I think, What a mess. But in reality, it is a useful exercise in revealing the ocean inside, the place we are in any given moment when we are able to just let our thoughts glide by. This writing was connecting me to me. And that is all that matters.  That is what kept me afloat during the school year.

For that, I'm truly grateful!



(Painting graphic "Entre Amigo" by Felix Murillo)