55. Unexpected Moment

 #66Challenge

 

Ever since the pandemic hit in 2020, and my mother's social life came to a grinding halt, I have been hearing her decline over the phone, and saw it for myself last summer. In July 2021, she was officially diagnosed with advanced Alzheimer's. Talking with her on the phone can often be difficult, as she stretches for words, repeats herself constantly, and because of her limited activity, has little of interest to say.

Over the weekend, we celebrated Mother's Day. I watched online as people celebrated their mother as their best friend, someone they cannot live without, sadness over lost mothers, all the usual Mother's Day fare.

The thing is, never in my life have I felt my mother was my best friend. To put it straight -- she was adamant while she raised us that we were to be independent beings. And it worked. All of us are independent beings. She is our mother, and she struggled through some difficult times. We were together through those things, and watched how she powered through (although that wasn't a saying at the time), leaning on faith and activity to keep her going. She's a survivor for sure.

When I called her on Mother's Day she already had a lot of activity, and was doing the usual repeating things a few times. Stretching for something to say, I began to tell her about my intensive reading students, some who are 8th graders reading at a 3rd grade level (she was horrified at that thought!), and how much they accomplished this year. We had done the final reading inventory and nearly all of them had improved. I explained how, even when I offered to help them, they took pride in doing things themselves, whether it was spelling words or working on comprehension activities. 

And that is when something strange happened. My mother got very lucid and clear, as she told me that the reason they succeeded is because I am their teacher. She said it was a testament to what a good teacher I am that they took pride in their success. She reminded me that I had good teacher and bad teachers, and the good teachers make all the difference. She said something to the effect, "You are that good teacher, and I'm proud of you."  

These words still bring tears to my eyes as I retrieve them as best as I can from my memory. The moment was so unexpected, I didn't even think to write down exactly what she said. First, I was shocked at how clearly she was speaking. Second, I was overwhelmed with the fact that she was even saying it. My mother is not one to tell us much about who we are or how she sees us. The moment was so unexpected, I still get tears in my eyes recalling it.

My mother may not be my best friend, but she taught me what was important: faith, activity, and finding ways to survive difficult times. She did her best, and she got the job done. The last two years of teaching has been a survival story for all teachers, and I am one of them. I applied all I know to help get me through this year, which was definitely my roughest ever.

I learned from the best, and I am grateful.

Thank you, mom.