Yesterday I revisited a blog I set up called "Courageous Conversations," and found an essay I wrote about technology and education and being more aware of my students beyond the electronic data.
In it was a quote from Michael Meade:
A teacher has to stand in the waterfall with her students.
After writing about being a Joshua Tree in the desert, sustained only by hope and strength, being patient waiting for the flowers and the fruit, the game of slow change, I suddenly don't feel so dry.
My tears carried me here.
I cried a lot last Monday when I closed up my classroom. Then there was a photo and a video and emails and even a phone call with Hyundai about our car lease.
Tears. Tears. Tears.
Water carrying me.
It took a long time to see how to get across the technology and reach my students. Doesn't seem like it should be difficult, but I didn't know how to "stand in the waterfall" with them if I wasn't in front of them.
I'm realizing ways.
It's the phone calls directly to their cell phones. It's the texts. It's helping them through an assignment.
It's with my creative writers as I see them working out their own healing through a poem they have written. Some are downright heart wrenching. Yet, I can't help but think -- would this have risen up if we were in a classroom writing together, where the presence of others can intimidate?
Maybe. Maybe not.
I don't feel dry anymore. I'm finding the water.
And it's through writing, writing, writing. And the little reach out questions. Text me your favorite place to eat. Your favorite place to go. Answer the survey: who is better, Nemo or Dory?
Human touches. Seeing them. A small kind of listening.
Emoji smiles and hearts back. So much more personal than in the classroom.
This work matters.
I have seen where we are headed in the fall, with a lot more technology used in classes. I am not against it. But, this is teaching me that pieces of humanity need to stay intact. A simple question. A quick write. A poem read aloud.
Before I set them on a computer path, I want them to know I see them.
I want them to see me.
I've been feeling more seen these days, something I did not expect at all.
Refreshed.
I told my AP during my evaluation that I was well aware this time will provide new insights in how to teach. I don't know what they all are yet, but I'm getting an inkling.
This work matters. No matter where I am, no matter how near or far, I am their teacher.
I will stand in the waterfall with them.
P.S. As I was finishing this piece, this song was on my playlist. I didn't know why, but it seemed to fit here perfectly. Then I watched the video and all I could think was wow -- the energy here is so much like a middle school classroom! It made me laugh.
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